We went to my parents this weekend to celebrate Mother's Day and to meet my new little niece, who is only two weeks old. My sister also has a three year old daughter, who was the main actress in the little drama that unfolded this weekend. Periodically, she would come out of her room with a flowing Ariel princess dress, large pink plastic heels and a elastic tiara on her head. She would glide into the room, beaming, and would just wait for everyone to see her.
She wanted to be beautiful.
She wanted every one to see her.
She wanted people to give her attention.
This struck me in such a new way, as if for the first time, I had 'eyes to see and ears to hear' what was really happening. This was my niece's heart on display for our family. She wanted to be seen, known and loved.
Throughout the weekend I became increasingly aware of how prevalent this desire was and how it played out in her life. I think we have all been around those kids who yell out "watch me" over and over until someone responds... sometimes out of frustration (as I know I have) and sometimes out of love. This desire is something we were created with, not something we learn. Our society however 'un-trains' little ones to be less and less vocal about that desire - so we become manipulative in an effort to still get that desire met. In the garden of Eden, we were created to be seen, known and loved by God. When sin entered into the world and we were evicted from the presence of God as it were, that created desire remained, leaving a longing we try and fill with so many things.
When a little girl wants to put on the princess dress, the tutu, the tiara, how do we typically respond? Are we quick to tell them they need to change? Goodness knows we can't go in public like that! What would people think? The point isn't that you should let your daughter wear a tutu 24/7, but it is however, that if we don't pay attention, we lose the opportunity to speak into their hearts the truth that they are beautiful, that they are seen, known and loved for who they are.
If you look for it, you will see it - in your wife's life, your girlfriend's life, you daughter's life. They are looking for it from you. You have the chance to speak into their heart and help them feel these things. I admit I often miss the opportunities to do this with my own wife. Not to make excuses, but I don't feel like I had 'eyes to see' this before now. By the grace of God, I am finally aware of it after half a decade of marriage. This applies to our hearts as men too, but maybe I will save that for another post?
I challenge you to do something this week that lets your spouse/girlfriend/daughter know that they are seen, known, and loved. Maybe you make an effort to tell her she looks beautiful in a certain outfit... maybe you leave a note in her car or in her room telling her that you are thankful for her... maybe you let your daughter wear the princess outfit to McDonalds for a dad/daughter date or dance with her in the living room... don't miss the opportunities to speak truth into the hearts of the women in our lives. It is one of our most important roles as men...
